These things were compensation so man could find joy in living. From love comes hope and faith as they are entwined. ‘What awaits you and Alexis is beautiful and worthwhile. It is true you won’t be able to love as a human when you’re changed. In fact you won’t even be able to recall and understand the concept any longer, your memory of it is gone forever. Therefore you won’t miss it since to you, it never existed. When and if a human should try to explain it to you, you won’t understand it when you too will think it’s, ‘childish rubbish’. ‘Having a vampire’s marriage with Alexis should not be regarded as second-best either. You’ll know this when you feel your telepathic connection. Your feelings for one another will come close to what you think love is now, in some ways it will surpass it. ‘During your transition she will try to grasp your human understanding of love but it will elude her grasp, always being just out of reach, like a capricious butterfly as it is eventually gone. " Cool!" I said."I can't believe it," she said excitedly. "My son and I are going to bebest friends- like sisters!" So if we're going to be best friends and everything, does that meanI'm going to start hanging out with you and your friends? As a woman?"I asked."How would you feel about that?" Mom replied. "Would it bother you? Iknow it would be embarrassing for you to get dressed up in front of myfriends, but I think it would be a good experience for you. It wouldbe a good way to learn adult female mannerisms and behaviors."I felt really excited at the idea of being included in Mom's circle offriends."Plus," Mom said, "If you're going to start living your life as anadult woman, people are going to expect you to be friends with otheradult women. Of course, if you don't think you're ready to meet myfriends as a woman, then I'd completely understand."I shook my head vigorously, not wanting Mom to misunderstand. Idesperately longed to be "one of the girls"!"Oh no, Mom!" I said.
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